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Oscarzzz '08

Last night was the third time this decade I didn't bother with the Academy Awards.  It looks like I wasn't alone, since news reports say last night's broadcast was perhaps the least-watched ever.  Compare that with the second-most-watched event ever on t.v., the last Super Bowl with an estimated audience of over 90 million.

Before the Super Bowl, there was a segment where various NFL stars and others, including some military folks, recited the Declaration Of Independence.  It was hard to keep a dry eye, I tell ya.  This year's Oscars had a segment where a group of soldiers serving in Iraq, via satellite, presented the award for best short documentary.  And right after that was another documentary award for an anti-war film that made our military into evil redneck killing bastards.  I'd never heard of it, but then again, most of the public hasn't seen any of the other anti-war movies either.  Jon Stewart injected liberal politics into the show and several celebs showed up wearing orange ribbons and bracelets to show solidarity with...wait for it...the terrorists locked up at Guantanamo!

That's right.  Today's Hollywood doesn't show solidarity with our troops but with foreign jihadists.

There was a time when Hollywood's great stars were as patriotic as the proverbial apple pie.  The silent film greats went out on the streets to convince people to buy war bonds during World War I.  Mary Pickford, the biggest movie star in the world, said, "I may only be five feet tall, but every inch of me is a fighting American!"  (Pickford was born in Canada.)  Can you imagine the likes of Jennifer Aniston saying that now?  Or Angelina Jolie?  During World War II, stars like Jimmy Stewart flew on missions against the enemy.  Others who couldn't be in uniform went to entertain the troops or participated in "canteen" films designed to pump up morale among the soldiers and at home.  Marlene Dietrich did some intel for the U.S..  Even during Vietnam, stars went to entertain the soldiers.
 
But today's Hollywood doesn't see itself as uniquely American and is becoming more isolated from American audiences.  How else to explain how with a few exceptions, most of the nominees were not hit films?  Hollywood's contempt for American audiences has made it more blatantly partisan.  It more often than not portrays this country as a dark, oppressive place full of hypocrites, the greedy, religious nutters, and bigots.  It doesn't care how the public perceives it anymore, since it feels like it only has to please foreign audiences, the media, and anyone within its bubble.  In other words, it doesn't matter if you like George Clooney so long as the celebrity press and everybody else in Hollywood likes him.  The aforementioned Mary Pickford was genuinely loved by audiences around the world.  She was a star because the people made her a star.  Clooney and his ilk are stars only because the press tells us so.
 
I don't know what the magic bullet is to solve this.  A megahit that is also appreciated by the awards-givers may come along every now and then but I can't help but think that so long as Hollywood is content with being its own island and can live with lower-rated award shows, nothing is going to change.
 
Ah well, those shows go on too long anyway.
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PETA's Celebrity Intimidation Campaign

Quick, what's the biggest cult in Hollywood?  Is it the Church of Scientology?  Is it the Kabbalah Centre?
 
Nope, it's People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, popularly known as PETA.  For years, the extremist animal rights group has used sex, celebrity, and popular culture to trick the young and the guillible into joining its cause.  They've sent Playboy centerfolds "dressed" in lettuce leaves out on the street.  They've had supermodels and actresses pose in the buff with the coy catchphrase "I'd Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur."  They've had rock stars and movie stars appear in ads.  Every year they have celebrity "sexiest vegetarian" polls
 
PETA vigorously focuses its efforts on turning people against fur.  Why?  Is wearing fur any more "cruel" than eating a burger or wearing a leather jacket?  No, not really.  But unlike a burger or a leather jacket, fur is a luxury item, and one not preferred by the youth.  So getting kids to be anti-fur is relatively easy.  Once PETA hooks you through its anti-fur crusade, it tries to sell you on rejecting all animal products as well as any sort of animal testing.  (PETA has campaigned against meat, milk, etc. as well as lab research involving animals.)
 
But if the honey doesn't attract enough flies, PETA isn't above using intimidation on the public instead.  PETA has had protesters hang around outside of fast food restaurants to harass hungry customers.  An infamous PETA campaign from a few years ago had members hang around theaters showing kid-friendly holiday classics like The Nutcracker.  They would target the kids walking in or out of the theaters with moms in fur coats, handing them free comic books that portray fur-wearing mommies as evil murderers who aren't above killing pet cats or dogs at home.  Members have also harassed fashion designers, magazine editors, and people on the street wearing fur.
 
Even though many celebrities publicly and privately support PETA, apparently there aren't enough buying its extremist vegan gospel.  So they've been trying to intimidate the infidels by publicly mocking them.  Just a few days ago, PETA issued a press-release bashing Aretha Franklin as "the worst dressed" person at the Grammys.  Now Franklin's musical talents far outshine her fashion sense but the only reason why she was singled out by PETA for ridicule is because she wore fur to the event.  Moreover, PETA knocked other fur-wearing celebrities like Lindsay Lohan.  The lowest blow though was when it basically called actress Eva Longoria-Parker a prostitute for her "trashy furs."  And just to show you how extremist these nutburgers are, they even went after Australian pop star Kylie Minogue for using a python skin purse.
 
That's right...snake skin will get you on PETA's black list.
 
What's next for the PETA cult?  Condemning celebrities for wearing leather shoes?  Bashing a star for eating steak?  Calling a starlet a whore for buying a jar of honey? 
 
The pathetic thing is these intimidation tactics have worked on some of these empty-headed, spineless celebrities.  Christina Ricci, Martha Stewart, and Alicia Keys stopped wearing fur after PETA went after them.  Shame on them!   The same sort of people who Hollywood and the media would hold up as "brave" and "bold" for thumbing their noses at conservatives and Christians fold like a deck of cards for a small group of wackos who don't love animals so much as they hate human beings. 
 
That's right, PETA doesn't love animals as much as they'd like for you to think.  Check out http://www.petakillsanimals.com to see the yucky truth about this group.
 
And if you really are in favor of humane treatment of animals, there are far better organizations that maybe aren't as glamourous but at least they're not thugs.
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Potty-Mouthed Geriatrics

"Hanoi" a.k.a. "Traitor" Jane Fonda decided to bring a little Valentine's Day cheer on the 2/14/08 broadcast of the Today show when she appeared with her buddy, alleged playwright Eve Ensler.  During their interview, Fonda uttered a vulgar slang term for female plumbing on live national television (it was bleeped out during tape-delayed broadcasts).  A couple of weeks ago, actress Diane Keaton dropped the f-bomb on live national television during an interview on Good Morning America.  In the first instance, Fonda was referring to the name of portion of the The Vagina Monologues while in the second, Ms. Keaton was using the f-word as a modifier.
 
Either way, accidental or not, these are hardly newbie starlets unaccustomed to live t.v. interviews.  These women have been in the spotlight for decades and they have done countless t.v. morning show interviews.  They know there are things you are not supposed to say on network television. 
 
So what happened?  Did 60-something Keaton and 70-year-old Fonda have senior moments and in the fashion of some old people, just let odd things fly at awkward moments?
 
No, I think it's even sadder than that.  Keaton and Fonda are products of the '70s and the women's movement.  They came out of a time when it was believed that civility and politeness were phony, while anti-social behavior was honest and authentic.  Women started showing their liberation from both the patriarchy and old-fashioned values by openly swearing.  It was quite the chic and rebellious thing to do back in the day to punctuate your sentences with the f-word as much as possible.  They still haven't outgrown that attitude.  Moreover, they want to show that even though they are old enough to get AARP discounts, they're still hip and edgy.  Hollywood values youth and if you are no longer young, you still need to be "youthful" in appearance and attitude.  They don't want so much to impress younger people but to impress their co-generationists, showing that while they may be grayer and wrinklier, they still haven't lost their rebellious spirit.  Swearing on morning t.v.!  Wow, they're still stickin' it to the Man!
 
Except to me and anyone else who appreciates maturity and class, they look like pathetic showbiz trash.  Worse yet, they showed total disregard for the fact that many schoolkids are sitting around eating cereal with GMA or Today on the telly as their moms are making their lunches.  Keaton's last film Mad Money flopped, while Hanoi Jane will likely remain a pariah to normal people outside of the media bubble.  We're so not impressed.
 
 
 
 
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Celebrity + Politics = Eeek!

It's a saying that politics is show business for ugly people.  Having lived in the D.C. area for 14 years, I can attest that there are just as many horror stories about uppity diva politicians as there are about uppity diva celebrities in NYC or L.A..  A Capitol Hill staffer is no different from a personal assistant.  Little wonder then politicians and celebrities are mutually attracted to the glamour and power of their respective professions.  The celebrities love the access to "real" political power and the appearance of substance while the pols love the star power only a celebrity could provide.

Even though I think a performer is a citizen too and is certainly free to run for office (it seems like the Republican ones do so far more often than their outspoken liberal counterparts), I've long disliked the idea that a candidate is worthwhile only because a bold-faced name supports that person.  Only 16-year-olds and folks who live by People magazine and TMZ.com, i.e. people who really should not or cannot vote, fall for that sort of thing.  Look at all of the hipster celebs falling over backwards to get behind Barack Obama for no other reason than he fits four important criteria:  1) he's liberal 2) he's not a bad-looking guy 3) he makes them feel good for voting for him and 4) his youthfulness.  It's Hollywood and it's the Upper West Side; they don't care about substance over there in those places.  I've seen it happen all before with Slick Willie in 1992.

As for the few brave souls who openly embrace Republican candidates, I salute their courage in a town that considers anyone to the right of Chairman Mao a Right Wing Christian Extremist, but then again, it ought not matter much that Adam Sandler or Sly Stallone endorses a candidate either.

Not only is putting your political trust in an actor or rock star stupid, it's also dangerous.  In the 1930s, all of the hip people in Germany who weren't Jewish or Communists got behind Adolf Hitler.  The Nazis went right to what remained of Germany's excellent film industry to get involved with the propaganda machinery.  The results were such fine propaganda films as "Triumph of the Will" and "Kolberg."  The Soviets in Russia also used the cool people in its film industry to sell Communism to its public, whether it liked it or not.  All of these talented, yet clueless, people lent their names and abilities to some of the worst regimes on Earth.  Leni Riefenstahl may have been one heck of a filmmaker but her choice in political support helped bring on the deaths of millions.

Today's dimbulb stars don't show any more judgment.  Movie stars and models have cozied up to the likes of Fidel Castro and Hugo Chavez, not caring very much about the folks these respective dictators have oppressed in the name of socialism or whatever.

Just think about that the next time you sit through that "Yes, I Can" video.
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R.I.P., Jack Bauer

     I admit I'm not a fan of "24," but I have watched several episodes.  While it was never a conservative show per se, it was a show that respected the American conservative's world view, particularly when it came to the War on Terror.  The show's producer is a known conservative and the program became a favorite with folks like Vice President Cheney and talk show host Laura Ingraham, etc..  In the process, it created a new t.v. hero, a Die Hard for the small screen in the persona of Jack Bauer, terrorist butt-kicker extraordinaire.  Always on the go--there was only a day to save the world after all--he had little time for the niceties of political correctness and wasn't above smacking around a terrorist to get him to talk.  This was of course an exception rather than the rule in Hollywood, which has produced movie after movie and show after show where the war on terror "goes too far" and poor innocents are needlessly tortured.

     But it looks like the writers can no longer swallow their vomit and keep pumping out scripts they disagreed with.  Poor ratings last season gave them carte blanche to "reimagine" the show to make Bauer and his adventures more palpable to their tastes.  They saw their chance to get invited to the right cocktail parties again.  First, ex-Air America host and all-around pain-in-the-butt Janeane Garofalo is cast on the show.  Then "24" proudly announces it's going to be the first "carbon neutral" show in town, complete with Kiefer Sutherland doing environmental PSAs.  The nail in the coffin though, is the direction the writers planned to take Bauer.  One idea even had him building huts in Africa!  It looks like now Bauer will be hauled in front of Congress to answer for the sins of previous seasons.  It's nothing more than a sham for the writers to expound (via various self-righteous pols) on the evils of torturing those who plan to murder thousands of people.  Eeek!

     Conservative fans of "24" are verklempt.  Many are vowing not to tune in this season.  Frankly, I think this is it for the program.  The liberal cognosceti will simply dismiss it as viewers tiring of terrorism as a topic.  The truth is most high-concept shows struggle creatively after about four or five years anyway and last season's episodes just weren't that good.  This reimaging won't work any better than Bo and Luke Duke's "cousins" on "The Dukes of Hazzard."  But at least the left-wing writers will be free to scribble more anti-war movies.

    
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